Bitter Sweet: The returning experience.

Being a returning expat, an ex-expat, a returnee or how you want to call it, has many challenges.   It is like a big wave. You can overcome a lot of difficulties by understanding what is happening. Compared to the literature on moving abroad, the literature on returning home is quite confined.  Here’s a brief description of reverse culture shock and some tips. 

At first you might be quite excited about the whole experience of being back.  

TIP 1: Go out there and  experience your own culture as if it was a foreign culture, get excited, get 
funny, get adventures, be free to explore and learn. Just be aware that this might change. 

Many people experience the next stage as feeling misunderstood.  Once back in your home
country you realise that living abroad has changed you a lot and the country you are returning to has changed as well. The experience you had by living abroad has literally broadened your perspective in so many ways.

 TIP 2: Bear with the fact that all your  experiences  you had abroad  can’t disappear any more, they have become an engrained part of you.  

Returning after living abroad for a considerable amount of time is a bitter sweet experience.  

TIP 3: Talking through this bitter sweet experience with other people who are going through the same transition helps a lot.

TIP 4: it is important to take your time to mourn over your lost expat life and also most important, to cherish all the beautiful moments you are experiencing  now and be aware that you are now making
new memories and stories for a later time. 

You gradually adopt to life at home again although you realise it’s not the same.

TIP 5: When comparing with the different destinations where you lived make sure you don’t judge. It is just a different experience not better or worse.

Finally, we arrive at the stage where we incorporate what we learned from abroad into your new life at ‘home’. 
 
TIP 6: Realize that you can create your own life, you are free to fill in, shape your life at your own liking, even in your own culture. 

It is all pretty normal to go through these different stages. However professional help can make the
process more bearable. If you have the feeling of being stuck in one of the stages or you feel it is too overwhelming to bear,  I advise to get professional help from a coach specialized in the field.